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Wednesday, November 9, 2011

I Love Dark YA Blogfest Week 2

This week during the I Love Dark YA blogfest we're supposed to write a 500 word short on this photo. Here goes:

The hatch protests with a horrible screech as it opens for the first time in ten years. Pale sunlight pours into the tiny opening to the surface world, blinding even it's softness. But it's beautiful, warm on my skin. I have forgotten how it looked, how it felt. But it isn't the bright, beautiful yellow I remember. It's white and muted, like it used to look on cloudy days.

With limbs that shake from anticipation, I climb the hatch ladder. The natural light hurts my eyes, forcing me to shade them as I take my first steps onto the surface. Peeking through my hands, I see that the world is now washed out shades of gray. Where is all the green? Gone, all gone. My eyes sting with tears.

A twig snaps, a hollow, dead sound. I am not alone.

Now I'm off to visit the other blogfesters! I hope you'll join me. 

24 comments:

  1. That picture chillingly goes with your excerpt. Love it! Wonderful job1 <3

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  2. Great job! The lack of green was a good touch.

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  3. Oooh, I like. Looks like things have drastically changed on the surface in the last ten years.

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  4. You captured the essence of the photo perfectly. Terrific job!

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  5. Nicely done, and I agree with E.R., the lack of the greenery creates this bleak imagery.

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  6. Brenda, thank you! Glad I could give you the chills.

    E.R., thanks!

    Karen, indeed they have. This is inspiring much more than it was mean to for me. :)

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  7. Brinda, thank you so much!

    Tina, thanks! Glad you liked that touch.

    Cait, thanks! :)

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  8. This is so fabulously evocative! You really put me right in the middle of this scene, and the last line gave me shivers!

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  9. Well done! You did a great job of using picture for inspiration.

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  10. Becky, thank you so much, I'm blushing!

    Isis, thank you. :)

    Desert Rocks, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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  11. Nice ending...way to keep your readers wanting more!

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  12. It's interesting to read all the different takes on the sunlight, and why she's covering her eyes in this blogfest.

    Great writing. :)

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  13. M.J., thanks!

    Golden Eagle, it is! I've really enjoyed reading the entries on this one. Thanks!

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  14. You did a great job. But who snapped the twig? The photo is evocative, Roland

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  15. You truly captured some of the keen essence of this picture. I could easily see the picture being drawn in response to what you wrote.

    Very nice.

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  16. Oooh, I love post-apocalypse. What a great idea to have her just coming out of a bunker after ten years. You really created a world in so few words. Great writing. Really powerful stuff!

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  17. Uh-oh-- creepy! love it! Nice final line! :D

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  18. Excellent job. I loved this... very vivid. Thanks for another creative post with your beautiful writing.

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  19. Roland, ah, who indeed?

    Angela, thank you!

    Shell, thanks. I love post-apocalyptic too!

    Monica, thanks hon!

    Karlene, you're very welcome. Thank you!

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  20. A twig snaps. A hollow, dead sound.
    I love that at the end!

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  21. I like your last line. Great job!

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