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Monday, February 7, 2011

Dark And Stormy Blogfest Contest

Brenda Drake, writer, blogger, tweeter and all around amazing lady, is hosting the Dark And Stormy Blogfest Contest. A blogfest and contest, sounds interesting you say? Well yes, yes it is, especially since it includes the fabulous agent Weronika Janczuk. Check out Brenda's blog to see how it works and what the outstanding prizes are. Without further ado, here is my entry:

Name: Heather McCorkle
Title: The First Dragonwatcher
Genre: YA Fantasy

Chemier loved it when people ran, it made the hunt that much sweeter.

41 comments:

  1. You start with a bad boy predator. It certainly draws the reader in. Great job, Roland

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  2. Intriguing. I like first lines to be short and sweet.


    Michael

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  3. Thanks Roland! The fun part is, it's a bad girl predator. ;)

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  4. Thank you Michael. It fit her personality to be short and uh... well, maybe not sweet. ;)

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  5. Great hook, Heather! Gave me chills! LOL :)

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  6. Ooooh! I got a little knot in my stomach. The payoff, "it made the hunt that much sweeter," is absolutely chilling. I'd definitely read on to find out what this bad girl is up to. Great job.

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  7. Ha ha! I don't know the contest, but it sounds pretty cool - and I absolutely LOVE that first line! I'm already intrigued by Chemier.

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  8. Melissa, perfect! Just the reaction I was going for.

    Linda, thank you. I love that it affected you that way.

    Lisa, you should get in on this contest! I'm glad you liked Chemier. She's your kind of gal. ;)

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  9. Short, sweet, and sets the claws in the reader. Flawless.

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  10. Golden Eagle, excellent! Thank you.

    Kate, thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it.

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  11. I love the simple, yet powerful first lines, and yours is a prime example...great job!

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  12. Thank you Jamie. I'm flattered!

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  13. Oooh creepy!! I love it. I'd definitely read the next sentence...

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  14. Love the voice of the *obvious* bad a$$ bad boy!

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  15. oooohhh Very awesome first sentence. Love it!

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  16. Mara, thank you! That's the best compliment I could hope for. :)

    Christopher, thanks! It's a character I grew to love to hate.

    Morgan, thanks!

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  17. Wow, that's a great first sentence. Very juicy and intriguing for only 13 words.

    I like it better than mine, but I entered the contest anyway!

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  18. Thank you Gina, but I don't know about that. ;) Best of luck to you! You never know what will strike an agent's fancy.

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  19. Wow, you do so much with this sentence! I'm already wondering if he'll be someone I want to see succeed or fail. Well done.
    Thanks for sharing!

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  20. Great opener. I really want to know what's going to happen next.

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  21. I have one nit to pick: those are two independent clauses, so they should be separated with a semi-colon. Other than that, I agree with everyone: brilliant first line!

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  22. Kathryn, thank you!

    Cheree, that's awesome, thanks!

    Hope, nitpick away that's what this is for! Thank you.

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  23. I'm checking out this blogfest. Sound great . . . and short. :)

    Great line, Heather!

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  24. You provide a good hook, but my eye stutters at the comma splice.

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  25. Stina, thank you! Yes, you should enter!

    Nicole, thank you. I'm thinking I need to lose the comma. Thank you for your feedback.

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  26. Great first sentence! The "it made the hunt that much sweeter" made it for me.

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  27. Wow! This sentence has it all! Superb! christy

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  28. Jen, thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

    Christy, thank you so much! :)

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  29. I loved it so much that I hate that I couldn't read more! I wish you luck with this one :D

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  30. Fantastic - I would definitely read more!

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  31. Monica, thank you! I love that. :)

    Marcy Kate, excellent! Thank you.

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  32. Heather, this is excellent! I absolutely love it. This sentence told what was happening, but it dripped with tone. They say voice is everything... I can hear the voice in this first line! I love it. You have an excellent voice!

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  33. That is awesome Karlene, exactly what I was going for! I love that her voice comes through for you. Thanks!

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  34. This is such a great hook. The only (very small) comment I have is to change your comma to a semicolon. Right now it's a splice. But great job and now I want to know more.

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  35. Thanks Loralie! I had another person tell me that so it looks like I'd better change it! Glad you liked it though.

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  36. Oh, short and sweet, but oh so fantastic. Great way to leave off on a cliffhanger of sorts, yet fill us in on setting and voice.

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  37. I like your sentences, but I wonder if they'd be stronger without the two "it" words. ??

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  38. Nathalie, thank you! I'm glad it leaves you with that cliffhanger feel.

    Pensees, thank you!

    Margo, you make a great point! Thanks.

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  39. My favorite first lines are short, to the point, and pack an emotional punch. This hit all three. Best of luck~

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